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Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Some updates...

Got back my results last fri...1A-,2B+,2B- and a S...not reali happy or sad abt the results...cap improved by a bit though, 0.01...lol...the sem that had passed been reali a stressful one...made a reali bad choice by taking 6 mods which are all veri diff...hiaz....anyway, its over le...will study hard again next sem...dun care whether can hit second upper a not le...just do my best...=) having fewer mod the coming sem...shld be more relax le...haha...yeah!!! went out w dear n her fren to orchard on sat...dear din reali shop much cos the main purpose for the both of us are to accompany her fren to shop for some clothes...haa...anyway, it was onli a few hours of shopping at the crowded orchard...
Hiaz...did a lot of bad n wrong things on sat nite n the whole of sun...made bao bao super upset n disappointed...act i dunno why i did all those stuffs oso...totally disappointed in myself oso...but 1 thing i learnt most is that bao bao is truely truely veri veri impt to me...so impt that i cant lose her at all...willing to trade all i have for her to stay by my side...though made her veri upset n disappointed, i wont let her go but held onto her even more tightly...just wanna remedy for wat i have done...wan to bring her true happiness and bliss...bought her 11 pink roses on sun itself*cost me a bomb*...haha...wanted blue but dun have le...11 is always a significant no. from me to her...it means 1 and onli 1 and that's my bao bao...this fact will not change...noe that wasn't enough so woke up early on mon to wait for her below her hse...waiting for her by the lift and sending her to sch...she had to reach sch at ard 715 and i was at the lift at ard 620...yawn...haha... though tired but everything paid off...she's super happy and touched...yeah!!! haha...
Today (tues) been a veri tiring day...yawn...nth much to do at work oso...more work better oso...restricted myself on sth for the past 2 days oso...

Friday, May 25, 2007

dear's results is coming out in 8 minutes time... donno why I am so anxious... and I think he is just anxious... sigh... oh dear....

Thursday, May 24, 2007

hmm... well, recently seems like there are a lot of weddings and proposals and all... all these things kinda like make me think when am I ever gonna get married and all... sigh... Some may think I am still too young to think about this, but in fact, I think I am pretty old already! About time for such things le.... but den again it will not be possible for me in the next 2 years at least... sigh.... =( what to do... Sometimes, I wonder... am I even destined to get married.... hmmm... well, at least I am allowed to fantasize and think right! ......

Talking about proposing... Really do hope for a surprise... haha.. maybe I have really high expectations bah... but I hope that my proposal will be at the right place with the right ambience and all... Not that there need to be others around, but I want it to be at a significant place (to both of us~), at a very appropriate and romantic time... ahhh... singapore flyer which opens next yr seems like a great place.. imagine... a proposal there! wow!!!! *dreamy state* (ignore me!) hahaha.... best if there is music... some songs which are so romantic which i love loads... hehehe.... =) that would be so great lah! hahahaha.... =) If the proposal really happens there, I would want to have my ROM there too... haha.. but again... money is an issue... would cost a bomb! sigh... nm... abandon such thoughts...

Hehe... talking about the actual marriage... had always wanted to have my wedding dinner at Conrad Centennial... Love that place... but yeah, costs a bomb... by the time i ever get married... think a table would cost about 1300 bucks... tsk tsk.... super expensive... sigh... =( well, den about the gatecrashing... haha... must have great ideas.. though I would nt really want to have a lot of things that would 'zheng' the bridegroom... but I would want him to do really special things... like proclaming of love... in a really special way... hehehe... singing of love songs... really simple yet sweet stuff that would touch me lots.... and of cos sure need some funny stuff lah... that would be up to my jie mei den le... hehe....

Yeah yeah... I knw this is not the time to talk about it... cos it is something that is so far away... but I just cant help it... plus I think about flats and all... oh dear.... sigh...

........................ anyway just blabbering out my thots... doesnt really matter anyway...

till that time comes.... =x

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

hehe... good good good good news!

I can get my new phone... haha... and dear dear got me cash vouchers from starhub.. haha... $150 ok!!!! keke... =) I am soooooo happy la! Finally, I can buy my new phone.. one that I bio-ed since last week.. hee... cos the previous one that I wanted was too expensive and it was already outta stock... Anyway, deciding between F300 and U600... wonder which one should I get... hmm... both are quite pretty and sleek.. just that F300 is more of a mp3 phone... and that it is more unique compared to u600 which is just a normal slide phone.. hee... =) so well, wonder wonder... dear dear prefers F300... and I think that is very sleek too.,. but was actually deliberating cos of the functions and all...

Anyway, bought 'ling' home yesterday.. hee.. hmm.. but both dear and I think that it is a male... =( but never mind.. he is also very cute.. just that it seems like we can put bao bei together with ling... sigh.. they would fight! =( =( =(

Well, dear dear once again assured me today... on all the things I blogged... thanks dear... really thanks a lot! I guess I am just worried that after the honeymoon period, everything will change.. and I really do not want it to... say I am naive.. but I really do hope and I believe in sweet love all the way... I believe that there is honeymoon period even after the first couple of years... *dreamy again*

Monday, May 21, 2007

Sigh...
That is all I can manage at this time... =(
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I think I think too much, worry too much. There seems to be so many things on my mind all the time and I always let my mind wonder all over the place.
I really wonder why I am always filled with thoughts of fear... of the fear that he will leave me... maybe not now, but in the future. Somehow, I am that insecure. It's not because of him. It's myself. =( Keep thinking that I will 'chase' him away sooner or later. With all my stupid actions and nonsensical worries.
I really am so tired. Emotionally. =(
I asked him some 'What if' questions. He gave me really definite answers, which should be consoling, but I felt it was too definite. He cant be that sure. Afterall, I witnessed that past.. the extent of the feelings, the extent of hurt, the extent of the things he had done... Even more silly, I asked him another question... What if his family actually prefers the former to me? That is how far I let my mind wonder. How crazily I allow my mind to think. Sometimes, I will think maybe they really do prefer the former to me. In terms of many things. Besides, they might be able to get along better.
Arrgghh... I am really trying to force myself to put them aside. I am so tired. Really really so tired. I wish I could put my brain to rest for a while at least. I wish I could stop letting my thoughts run so wild.
I totally have no mood today. Can't even manage a tweak in my lips, what more a smile. =(

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Jaded... one word to describe how I feel now... about almost everything... though I really am trying very hard to make myself happy... but well.. sigh...

Sometimes, I really think I think too much... read too much... except work too much... sigh... read something which actually quite changed my mood... I donno if I read too much into it or what... but den it just made me think about the past... and it made me pretty upset... but den I still continued talking to dear.. trying to forget about it and all... but den in the end.... din help much... din really talk much with him on the phone...

sigh... then when he got home, his mum started asking him about some stuff... and well, I think I got him into trouble by insisting that he get some stuff... Actually, I think he did not want to buy it, but then cos I had said it many times and I was reallly insistent and he din wan make me unhappy, he finally agreed to buy it... but in the end, it kinda caused him some sorta trouble... =(
Well, lead me to think that I should not interfere with that aspect of his life... There seems to be a line drawn somewhere... between me and him... or maybe cos... well.. i donno...

never mind...

hope tomorrow is a better day... hope I recover from my 'jaded-ness'... for now, I want some time alone...

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

well, been in a bad mood recently.. feel kinda depressed in some sense... sigh.. also donno why.. most of the things cos of work... so I am really hoping that holidays will come faster.. cos I really need to have them... if not, I think I am going to go crazy... sigh... Hopefully, I will be able to recover then...

suddenly I am thinking why must there be so much competition at work? Why can't we do our work quietly? Why must some people do their work for everyone else to know? Why must they 'announce' to everyone for every little thing they do? Sigh... seriously, I prefer to work quietly... rather than knw that I am being assessed every single second... sigh... really don want to be that way.... I just want to do my stuff.. that is all! =(

Anyway, been kinda having work refusal... having trouble at work... with some difficult people... complain at every single little thing.. and they can rember those kinda issues for again and again and again... can
t believe those people...

having a headache now.. sigh... throbbing one... help!

Monday, May 14, 2007

Yeah! Finally I can blog! Been wanting to blog for quite some time but din manage to get in cos of the silly addy thingy.. which I don understand... But well, thanks for the fact that I read Zim's blog.. haha... =p

Anyway, went to Malaysia yesterday for fitting for some gowns for my friend's wedding.. gonna be her bridesmaid... hehe... =p well, first time I see bridesmaid wear long gowns one leh.. and den I must wear the gown both morning and nite... according to my dear bride.. HOT! and WARM! the only words I can think of... and I really have to try hard not to dirty the gown.. oh dear.... careful careful careful...

Went shopping for a while and bought 2 dresses and a top... hehe... quite like them... material and design... hee... dear dear also like the dress and top i bought... silky kinda material.. and dresses are super retro lor... hahaha...! I like them! Psychoed dear dear that he must try to accompany me to shop in JB again some day during my hols.. hahaha... =)

hmmm... dear dear said to give him 2 years... sometimes I wonder... am I like pressuring him? Sigh... actually seeing friends around get married and all makes me think about my future house and being married too... but well... reality... is not that case... still quite some time for me anyway... so gotta wait lah... On one hand, I do trust wad dear says... but on the other, I am worried that he will feel very pressured and all... and that is not good... sigh... really donno what is a good solution... Sometimes, I love to look at rings and all.. but I am also scared that I will be giving him pressure in this sense as welll.... sigh...

Well, was telling dear dear about one of my friend's spending habits.. quite scary to me... she seems to have endless amounts of money to spend... her savings seems damn 'thick' and sustainable... well, i donno lah... I have to admit I really do envy... being able to just buy and spend like that... sigh.. Then, I wont have to ponder so long over buying a ring.. of which I havent bought at all... =(

Anyway, sleepy... gg to slp...

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

something to add

btw, just want to add that...i'm so glad that i have my bao bao...she will be there when i'm down, trying to cheer me up and help to reduce my burden...cant do w/o her...reali reali love u lots...just want u and u onli bao bao...

Happy 10th Month Bao Bao

Happy 10th Month Bao Bao...so fast we are alr 10 months together le...time reali passes veri fast when we are spending time together...sometimes reali hope i can enjoy each and every seconds passing...Seriously, looking forward to our 1 year anniversary and all the years to come... sometimes i do reali hope i can graduate soon and come out to work and all but at times, i prefer time to pass slowly...quite a contradiction rite...haha...anyway, been busy the whole day at work...started my attachment at SIMTech since monday...been assigned some tasks and i enjoyed doing it...designing and drawing and all...so interesting lah...dun mind working there as a permanant staff sia...haha...been quite tired cos have to give tuitions as well as work...this week happens to be the exam period of my students so have to give them tuition...so sian...anyway, i decided to buy Bao Bao roses as part of my 10th month gift for her today...rushed to west mall rite after my tuition to buy the roses, so afraid that they will be close by then as it was ard 9 plus le...luckily still have and then rushed to take bus to bao bao's place...so glad that bao bao is super happy when she saw the roses...hee...seiously dun like to c her unhappy...she unhappy i oso unhappy...hope she can always stay happy...
suppose to be a happy day but stupid mindef refused my application for my deferment...i am super super pissed off...cant i just defer for this year!!! i am having my attachment lah...not as if i'm gg to play or wat...they give reasons such as the program (VIP) not complusory...wat the!!! though VIP not complusory, dun they noe if u are able to go, u are better off than others who cant go? furthermore gg for VIP can lesser my work load for the next 2 sems... afterall, being attached to SIMTech not easy oso lah...cant they be more understanding...i have been gg for ICT for the pass 2 years...i can go for VIP last year but i din...so, this means if not complusory, i cant go lah....wat the hell...gg to send appeal letter...hiaz...hope they can reali approve it...i reali a bit pissed off...=(=(=(

Monday, May 07, 2007

our weekend...

Hee... just finished ironing my clothes... well just came back today from a wonderful weekend! =) hehehe.... I really enjoyed myself this weekend...

On Friday night, dear and I went to Zim and Key's chalet @ Pasir Ris.. Reached there quite late abt 9pm.. cos we went to buy some tidbits and all... hehe... =p When we reached, some of them were already done with their dinner... so we ate what they bbq-ed... hehe... the satay was really good.. yummy.. and dear dear patiently bbq marshmallows for me! hahaha... Thanks dear... he is sooooo sweet always... as usual... we sat there and chit chatted for like hours... while some others were playing games... hehe... There were quite a number of the bballers around... really fun talking to them... and really funny too.. hahaha... In addition, the way Amanda suan dear dear was really funny and comical too... hehe...

They also talked abt when getting married and all... hehe... then a question popped into my mind, next yr ROM should invite so many ppl? hmm....

Well, the atmosphere for me was really good all the way till someone asked abt her... and twice in a row... that made me cringed for a while... and i suddenly became quite quiet for a moment....=( but anyway, its fine la! =)

After that, we played MJ for a while... till morning... then dear and I went up to slp... haha.. concussed till abt 11 like that... and den we just continued to nuan on the bed.. haha.. just too lazy to wake up... loved the feeling of nuaning beside dear... and it was so comfortable... hehe... anyway woke up abt noon... and we went swimming... first time swimming with bei bei... hehe... fun fun fun! =p swam for abt half hour or so, we went back to get ready to go off... cos we wanted to make a move so that we can go book our tickets and check into the hotel...

We reached town around 2pm... we proceeded to The Cathay to buy our tickets for Spiderman 3... the stunning thing was that by then all the tickets till abt 1030 was all finished le! =p Luckily, dear and I was able to get a couple seat for the 1030 show... hehe... lucky us! =)

After buying the tickets, we went to have our breakfast cum lunch... hehe... then we went to check in... well, the place is a really really nice and cosy place.. hee... comfy and near to town... hehe... well, we simply slacked till around 6pm den we got ready to go out... hahah... we went to town and walked around and shopped around... dear dear also managed to get his inquest and MTG magazine... Really a great time just walking around with dear... knowing that our day will not end just cos night is here....

Saw a ring at Soo Kee.... really beautiful ring... which after discount would cost 400 bucks... really really gian to buy for myself.. but sigh... donno leh... i knw dear would prefer me to save the money and not anyhow spend like this... actually I think if dear had the ability, he would definitely buy for me... but nope, really don wan him to spend the money... so thought of treating myself to the ring.. hehe... well, see how lah.... =/

Went to watch the movie... not bad... just that action seems a bit lesser than the love scenes... which isnt really what we expected... but ok lah.. overall there are many scenes which I thought was quite good.. and the show is quite meaningful... Can watch lah... Besides, I managed to get the couple seats! hahah...

After that, we went to buy the Rocher Road beancurd... yum! yum! and we also bought some cup noodles to cook and eat... by the time we were done, it was like 2 plus already... and we ate and I fell asleep soon after... feel like a pig ah! =( worse! Then dear collapsed soon after me... and we slept till morning... was quite tired ah... so was dear dear.... it really is a nice feeling to be able to wake up and see dear beside me... as well as being able to slp in his arms... loved to be wrapped around by him.... hehe.... =) Really, dear! =) This morning, we had breakfast at the hotel... quite a nice breakfast.. especially the harshbrown and the cereal! yummy! =) eat till pretty full and went back to the room and we cconcussed again! Oh dear, really bad right? hahaha.... finally managed to drag ourselves out ard noon cos no choice... dear and i really wished to just slack all the way in the room... hahaha.... after checking out, we went to walk around a while again... and we saw Zim and ZJ at Paragon.. apparently, they had some class outing.. hee... such a coincidence.. hee... =p

Around 2 plus, we took bus back to dear's house to slack and slp again... today really a slacker day! tsk tsk.... slp and wake up slp and wake up till abt 4 plus... and we went to IMM.... shopped a bit and then went home for dinner.... till now lah!

Dear is having his attachment tmr! Jia you bei bei! I'm always there for you.... rembr the key chain okie! =)muackz...

Dear, just want you to know that I realy enjoyed this weekend, and I so do look forward to more.... Let us work hard together for our future k... You said it, this weekend is only a prelude... =)

P.S. dear got his sliver legion... =)

Thursday, May 03, 2007

hehe.. yes yes yes! I am a big big fan of Precious Moments stuff! hahaha.. =) Love them to bits! Thanks a lot dear! =) Yup, I yearn to have a cupboard full of those figurines! hee...

Anyway, we are going for chalet tomorrow! YEAH! so long never had a chalet le... finally I am able to go for the chalet already! hahaha.... *gleeful* Really happy to be able to spend the weekend with dear dear with no worries!

Looking forward to tmr!

Oh, Future Sight is coming out tomorrow as well! =)

Present for Bao Bao

Bought a precious moment figurine for bao bao the other day...was walking and roaming about for quite some time thinking wat is the best gift to her...finally precious moment came into my mind...i rmb that there was one veri lovely figurine which bao bao n me saw b4...noe my bao bao likes it on first sight...its veri meaningful and it seemed like its custom made for the both of us... hee... there's a girl holding a plate of cookies and a guy holding a bouquet of flower which he is hiding behind his back...in front of them is a cat and a dog and they are licking at a same plate of milk...so cute rite...haha...so i decided to buy it for her...and for yr infor, my bao bao loves stuffs from precious moment lah...her dream is to have a cupboard filled with figurines, all from precious moments...haha...hmmmz...maybe i can help my bao bao fulfill her dream wor...hee...anyway, hope she reali likes the figurine and rmb the significance behind the figurine...the boy and girl will always be in the same position, they will not leave one another at all and we are just like them...will always be together...=)

Wednesday, May 02, 2007

outta the house!

Finally bao bao and bei bei (our hamsters) are out of their homes! haha... =) Brought them out for a trip... hehe... to dear dear's house... hehe... =)

bad day!

I deleted all my messages in my inbox! all my SMSes! =(

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

updates!

Yeah! We got our booking for Fort Canning Lodge this Saturday! =) hehe... finally after much difficulty. Well, finally we decided to settle on this one instead cos we really couldn't get a chalet despite the fact that we really wanted to have it. Felt like it wasnt worth it to spend like 200 bucks booking the room when we were going to waste one night... so in the end, we decided against it...

I am SOOOOO looking forward to this weekend! =) Excited! I can't wait at all! Really wish the week would pass asap and reach weekend! Dear and I have so many plans. oh, not to forget... watch spiderman 3! Rave reviews apparently!

Well, we went for an overnight mj session yesterday. Won some money and bought a new food dish for our darling hamsters. hee... =) Quite tired today as we did not get to slp much... but then, I still loved spending time with my dear and our hamsters... hee...

We are going to bring our hamsters out tomorrow! =) hehe... we are going to dear's house to help to celeb his sister's birthday, so we thought we could make a trip home first and the bring our darlings out! hehehe... really happy and elated at the thought of that! =) Woah... their first trip out! So exciting... for them and myself! hehehe.... ;p

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Dear bought me a present yesterday. A Precious Moments figurine. *Glistening eyes* I am soooo super duper happy... Actually, he bought the gift for me was because of our arguement yesterday. Quite a bad one.... and I said many things which I should not have said. Dear dear wanted to assure me and so he went to get me the present... According to him, he walked around Lot 1 trying to search for a perfect and suitable gift to help him pass the message he had for me.... he even contemplated buying a diamond ring which I told him I liked very much... But LUCKILY, he did not buy it! Really do not want him to waste that kind of money... me heartache ah! Rather he spend on himself! In the end, he went to WM and bought the PM Limited Edition figurine. Quite expensive too! Feel really bad making him spend those money... sigh... me and my bad temper! =( the figurine shows a boy and a girl happily with their pets, a dog and a cat (depicting me and dear respectively --> dog = me; cat = dear) We saw that figurine some time ago and I said I loved it very much... hehe... dear always remembers! =) Thanks my love ! Well, I think dear dear just wants me to be assured and trust him... have faith in him and believe in our future....
Thanks a lot, my dear. I really do appreciate all that you have done for me! Really do! =) I love you loads!


~ Chester ~

    Full-Time Bliss's Dear Dear
    NUS Undergrad
    Full-Time Volunteer
    Loves Bliss dear, our hamsters, bball, magic and sleep!!!
~ Bliss ~
    Full-Time Chester's Dear Dear
    Children's Nemesis
    Part-Time Volunteer
    Loves Chester dear, our hamsters, jewellery making, bags clothes, all things nice!!!

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