Wednesday, August 23, 2006
great ending to the day...
well, though I had a super bad start to the day... it all ended well... 5yi's thing more and less settled le... den my mood also much better le... hee.. =p
well, why did it end well? Main reason is of cos my dear dear (what else??!!!)! hee... He is one person who always manages to cheer me up in any situations.. hee... as long as it is not related to him... keke.. as in my sadness... even if cos of him, he will still be able to cheer me.. just that it will take a slightly longer time lah... hee... i really cant bear to stay angry or upset at my dear dear for too long.. i also dont like to give him black face for very long too... hee... =p
well, my dear dear came to look for me at aunt stall after his bball mtg in school.. he told me a piece of news! He has stepped down as the chairperson of the bball subclub of nus!!! Frankly, I am quite happy to hear this pc of news.. simply because I know that dear dear is realy very busy already... with his tuition and other FY stuff and well, recently me as well *blushes*.... so stepping down is something that he really hopes to... and yeah.. now he has finally stepped down... taking up the post of an advisor instead... well, he has to handhold the new chairperson of cos... and I think it is reasonable and responsible of him to do that... well, at least I think and I hope he will not be so stressed le.. especially over his bball thingy... His bball stuff seems endless at times... sigh.. and he is always so stressed and worn out over it... =( worse is the other time where we kinda quarrelled over smethg related to that... =( =( =(
Hope that now he has let go of one of the things that he hopes to, he would be more relieved and less stressed... however, donno why, I keep having this nagging feeling as to whether dear is really happy to step down or not... Seriously, I have no idea why I feel this way... sigh... Just felt he doesnt seem to be totally really happy... cos when he was at my auntie's place, he looked so tired and distracted... seemed to have millions of things on his mind... sigh... asked him, he kept saying nothing... *shrugs* I really have no idea... Sometimes I wish I have the ability to read one's mind... =(
Well, anyway after helping out at aunt's place, we went back to my house... well, dear dear is just really sweet to come by auntie's place and den come to my house... hee... we had dinner (or rather supper!) at my house... dear dear cooked... hee... though simple fare, I enjoyed myself totally... cos it's dinner with dear dear at home! ^.^ everything to rejoice abt... keke... (",)
so yeah.. though I did not really have a great beginning... all turns out well in the end... Yay!!! I am soooo happy! kekeke... thanks dear for always brightening up my day... ^.^
****************************************** Hmm... donno why I have this nagging worry in my mind.. I always feel that the more I love, the less I get from the other party... The more I put in, the more I am taken for granted (in some sense)... I really do not understand myself.. Is it cos I am expecting too much? Why do I feel like I am not being loved as much? sigh... =/ I really wish I don have this thoughts... Is it really true that this happens? I have no answer to this... i hope not... I cannot be sure at all... sigh... Am I expecting too much? Why am I thinking this way? It is not that I expect others to give out more than me or the same amount as me... cos I knw I am the kind who will love my other half more and more deeply as time passes... and the more I cant bear to let go... I just don want to be taken for a fool or taken for granted... I knw that love is often not fair.. But I guess I just dont want to be not loved at all... *shrugs* I really do not understand myself at all at times.... I am so hard to please... =(
well, why did it end well? Main reason is of cos my dear dear (what else??!!!)! hee... He is one person who always manages to cheer me up in any situations.. hee... as long as it is not related to him... keke.. as in my sadness... even if cos of him, he will still be able to cheer me.. just that it will take a slightly longer time lah... hee... i really cant bear to stay angry or upset at my dear dear for too long.. i also dont like to give him black face for very long too... hee... =p
well, my dear dear came to look for me at aunt stall after his bball mtg in school.. he told me a piece of news! He has stepped down as the chairperson of the bball subclub of nus!!! Frankly, I am quite happy to hear this pc of news.. simply because I know that dear dear is realy very busy already... with his tuition and other FY stuff and well, recently me as well *blushes*.... so stepping down is something that he really hopes to... and yeah.. now he has finally stepped down... taking up the post of an advisor instead... well, he has to handhold the new chairperson of cos... and I think it is reasonable and responsible of him to do that... well, at least I think and I hope he will not be so stressed le.. especially over his bball thingy... His bball stuff seems endless at times... sigh.. and he is always so stressed and worn out over it... =( worse is the other time where we kinda quarrelled over smethg related to that... =( =( =(
Hope that now he has let go of one of the things that he hopes to, he would be more relieved and less stressed... however, donno why, I keep having this nagging feeling as to whether dear is really happy to step down or not... Seriously, I have no idea why I feel this way... sigh... Just felt he doesnt seem to be totally really happy... cos when he was at my auntie's place, he looked so tired and distracted... seemed to have millions of things on his mind... sigh... asked him, he kept saying nothing... *shrugs* I really have no idea... Sometimes I wish I have the ability to read one's mind... =(
Well, anyway after helping out at aunt's place, we went back to my house... well, dear dear is just really sweet to come by auntie's place and den come to my house... hee... we had dinner (or rather supper!) at my house... dear dear cooked... hee... though simple fare, I enjoyed myself totally... cos it's dinner with dear dear at home! ^.^ everything to rejoice abt... keke... (",)
so yeah.. though I did not really have a great beginning... all turns out well in the end... Yay!!! I am soooo happy! kekeke... thanks dear for always brightening up my day... ^.^
******************************************
Hmm... donno why I have this nagging worry in my mind.. I always feel that the more I love, the less I get from the other party... The more I put in, the more I am taken for granted (in some sense)... I really do not understand myself.. Is it cos I am expecting too much? Why do I feel like I am not being loved as much? sigh... =/ I really wish I don have this thoughts...
Is it really true that this happens? I have no answer to this... i hope not... I cannot be sure at all... sigh... Am I expecting too much? Why am I thinking this way? It is not that I expect others to give out more than me or the same amount as me... cos I knw I am the kind who will love my other half more and more deeply as time passes... and the more I cant bear to let go... I just don want to be taken for a fool or taken for granted... I knw that love is often not fair.. But I guess I just dont want to be not loved at all...
*shrugs* I really do not understand myself at all at times.... I am so hard to please... =(
